Insomnia

I sit here writing at 5:55AM having been up for three hours. I have only slept two hours. I am terribly tired, but my mind is going too fast to sleep. As usual, it is the same thoughts on an endless loop. An image of a roll of film that has reached its end on an old projector comes to mind. It clicks on incessantly until someone finally turns it off.

To say the least, it's annoying.

When this happens, my wife usually kicks me out of bed, so she can sleep. I always oblige and go into the office to work on something to keep my mind occupied. That's totally understandable, and I appreciate her predicament. Still, I feel totally alone in my state, as everyone else in the family is sound asleep. Like I should be. But I'm not.

I always oblige and go into the office to work on something to keep my mind occupied.

I have been experiencing insomnia much more frequently lately. Part of that, I'm sure, is due to the stress and uncertainty of my recent change in life. I went from being fully employed making a pretty good salary to being laid off and struggling to get a business going. A big change.

At times, I have watched my wife interact with the kids when they can't sleep. She checks in to see if they are too hot, or too cold, or haven't eaten enough,etc. All valid reasons for not sleeping. But sometimes it's just because you can't sleep.

For me, insomnia is one of the worst parts of bipolar disorder. At times,it seems the only thing worse would be the hell of severe depression.

How do you deal with insomnia?